Stuart pressed his face up against the bars of his cell; straining to see if anyone was near, desperately hoping to see the presence of another person, yet at the same time fearing the same. First one direction then the other he cast his eyes, searching the narrow strip of vision that his position afforded him for a shadow, a noise, some hint that one of his jailers was close enough to hear him. He wanted the companionship, even if he must pay the price for his demands upon their attentions…

     He stepped back and grabbed hold of the bars of his prison, shaking them as if by some strange twist of fate he had suddenly been endowed with super-powers and was now able to tear the bars out of where they stood, solid in defiance, or perhaps change his body structure into a pliable form and then simply ooze out between them. No such transformation took place, however, and he was left only with a red mark on each palm. In frustration he checked each and every bar, but this was a newer, more expensive facility, built just for him, and checked thoroughly against just such defects.

    He couldn’t hardly blame them for updating the facility, after his last escape and the mayhem that had ensued on his brief taste of freedom… it had taken them a long time to remove the marks that his foray had left upon society… and they had quickly taken steps to ensure that there would be no repeat of the previous rampage.

    This cell was specially reinforced, each bar securely braced at both top and bottom, with cross braces set between. It was a cage within a cage, for he not only would have to escape from the cell itself, there was the room outside that he would have to also get out of as well. From this side of the cell, he could at least see the window across the room, and often spent hours watching the clouds drift by, or the rain as it splattered against the glass and slowly slid down. Lately, he had even seen snow, spiraling downward with the wind, piling up at the bottom of the window casement. He resented them all… free… with no bonds holding them save those of Nature… and Fate.

     Worst of all was that he had no idea what he had done to deserve such treatment. Hours upon hours he had racked his brain, searching for the answer to that question, and had yet to arrive at a satisfactory conclusion. He had to accept the fact that perhaps he had done something so terrible that even his own mind had shut it out, refusing to retain even the memory of such a horrendous deed. He had often pleaded with his jailers to tell him what he had done, why was he locked away like this… but it seemed almost that they couldn’t … or wouldn’t understand him, or perhaps it was just that they were under orders themselves to not have any sort of rapport with him, thus bearing witness to the fact that whatever he had done was so odious that even hardened guards such as his had been shocked to such a point that they refused to even speak to him, other than to taunt him in some language that he couldn’t understand.

     They didn’t always keep him locked up, however… he was occasionally brought out for brief periods to exercise in the main hall, but he remained under constant supervision at all times. Even when he was fed, at least one of his captors remained present, bringing him his plate of tasteless, putrid food, and then taking it away once he was done. It was nasty stuff, but he knew that he had to keep his body fueled if he was ever to escape again. And he swore that he would, given any chance at all.

     He spent a large portion of the time in his cell in thought, planning his next escape attempt, but also in dreams of the life that he hoped to have, once he could get away. He had only a few desires, mostly just a warm place to live; decent food… not much more than that.  The simple pleasures were the most important… but freedom… freedom… that was his highest priority, and something that he simply refused to do without, and if he died in the gaining of it… then so be it.

     He lacked any sort of tools, and any attempt to smuggle even a spoon into his cell had been quickly discovered, and quickly removed. He had no access to anything else, and his mind had worked feverishly at some way, any way to get hold of something to help him in his next attempt. A knife would have been a great boon, even if he had to dig his way out with a spoon, at least he would be making the attempt to be free.

    At times he sat dejectedly in a corner of the cell, his mind having convinced him that no… he would never be able to escape, that he would live the rest of his life, and die behind these very bars. Sometimes these moods lasted for days before he would snap out of it and renew his attempts…

    It was out of this desperation that his latest plan took shape. Lacking any weapons or tools save those that Nature had given him, he had decided to lure one of his captors within reach, and simply do his best to kill them. Perhaps… if only one of them answered his cries, then he might possibly be successful, and then seek his escape. He knew that if both of them came, that he had no chance… but at this point, he no longer cared. He would rather die free than waste away in here forever.

     So he took a stance at the bars, and grasped one firmly in each hand. Throwing his body back and forth, he jerked wildly at the cage. Yelling at the top of his lungs, he shouted insult after insult at them, even though he knew that they wouldn’t understand a thing that he was saying, but venting his frustration and anger in taunts, and denigrating statements as to their parents, their sexual orientation, their race... hell… he even insulted their hair…

     He heard the outer door open, and braced himself, but still continued his tirade, now frantic as he realized that the time of action was here… there was no turning back, for he was totally committed to this… his final attempt to be free!

     It was the female guard who had answered his cries… good… perhaps his luck had finally turned in his favor. He redoubled his efforts, shaking the bars, and crying out at the top of his lungs… then, as the woman reached in for him… he lunged



     Lois laughed out loud… “Oh my, Stewie… you sure gave Mommy a good hug!” She scooped him up out of his playpen and hugged him back. “It’s time for some more of those strained peas and carrots that you love soooo much! Then, bathtime for my little Stewie!”  She bundled him up over her shoulder, and closed the door behind them…

Authors note:  Yeah, yeah, gimme a break, you know even though you groaned at the end of it, you liked it!








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